Going to Red Sox games at Fenway Park is not as enjoyable as it used to be. There, I said it.
I love the Red Sox and have loved them since 1983. My first detailed memory is the day Yaz retired and did laps around the park slapping high fives with the fans. I cried. I cried in 1986 when they lost to the Mets. Of course I had no clue about 1918 or any of that stuff, I was just a 12 year old kid upset his team lost in the World Series. I have followed the Sox for a long time and always enjoyed going to games at Fenway. I can clearly remember my first time walking up the ramp in left field when the Sox played the Orioles in 1984. John Tudor was pitching for the Sox and just as we walked in, Gary Roenike put one into the net above the Green Monster. Okay, so my love of the Sox and Fenway is established right?
Cut to 2008 and my first game of the year last night. Let me just say this, if I was from out of town, either a Tigers fan or just a baseball fan taking in a game at a classic ballpark in a historical city, I would have left with the worst impression of Sox fans and the city of Boston. And two guys caused it. In my circle, we refer to the typical drunk "that guy" at Fenway as Murph or Sully. It's a generalization but whatever. I've had a ten game ticket package since 2004, the same four seats in Section 42. Since that time, it has been clear to us that the seats directly behind us are scalped for every game. The majority of time we get yahoos up there. But last night's twosome, the king of the yahoos. They roll in about the 3rd inning, glassy eyed, double fisted with beers, already slurring their words. They approach their seats in the middle of an inning, during the action. Yet for the rest of the game, any time someone else does that in their row or the rows directly in front of them, they'd curse at the people for doing such a rude thing. A minute or two after their entrance, I hear "ahh man, the vodka spilled all down my sock". Apparently the flask they were so proud to sneak in wasn't going to give them much more then a stinky foot. Damn. A few minutes later, one asks the other "are you gonna puke?" The rest of the game, I wasn't sure if I should lean forward and try to take the vomit towards the small of my back, or lean back and hope the force of the puke would ricochet off my shoulders back at the guy. I would estimate that 1 out of every 5 words these kids (by the way, I am guessing early 20's and doubtful on college degrees) was an F bomb, and that might be a conservative estimate. At one point one was bragging about all the F-bombs he was dropping at a game last year, "I don't give a F if it's a family F'in ballpark, F your family, I'm at the F'n Sox game and I'm gonna F'n talk shit." Nice. Reminiscing about how they've ragged on opposing team's outfielders was popular too "remember that time, you were F'n yellin at Ichiro dude?" "F yeah dude, F Ichiro, he's not even that good dude, he like doesn't F'n carry his F'n team!" HUH?
After a few innings of this, my three friends and I were pretty much speechless. We literally didn't speak, just watched the game, clapped, and shook our heads at these yahoos. Every inning that passed, every beer they consumed, they got dumber, slurred more, and got louder. Each round they came back with they complained about the price of the beer. One of them thought he was cool when he started lobbing gummi bears at the nice female Tigers fan a few rows in front of us. When she looked back and asked if it was me all I could think was "umm...I am not eleven, I don't eat gummi bears at Fenway". She asked the idiots, they denied it of course. If she didn't have a Tigers visor on, I am sure she would received their "hey baby" as she walked up the aisle. Puh-lease, good chance neither of these kids has ever had sex he didn't have to pay for. Fortunately for us, they left after beer was shut off in the 7th inning, and despite the Sox losing 7-2, we were able to enjoy the last couple innings.
I could go on and on about their behavior. But the sad fact is these guys are not unique. The park is filled with these yahoos now. They act like they are the biggest Sox fans in the world, yet when the opponent scores 4 runs in an inning, ten minutes later they're asking "wait...when did it get to 4-2?" I just don't get it, they obviously scalped the tickets, so at a minimum, they paid double face value, about $52. They consumed about 6-8 beers each during the game , that's another $50-$60 each...at least. Total time spent actually watching the game and enjoying the baseball? I'm guessing at most an inning and a half. They spent more time just ridiculing other people in the section, since obviously they were perfect and the consummate fans. But why not take that $100 each and go to the local pub where the drafts are like 2-3 bucks? Why wouldn't they do that? Because going to Fenway is the cool thing to do, and despite how they acted and how much of the game they actually took in, they'll still go to their $12 an hour jobs the next day and brag about how they were at the game. They'll even call their buddies during the game and tell them to look for them on TV....21 rows behind the visitors' bullpen. Yeah, that's a common screen shot.
It's a sad state of affairs. People complained when more and more women started going to Sox games sporting their pink hats. But hell, at least a fair share of them are easy to look at and stay quiet. They probably can't name a player other than Jacoby or Tek, but they don't yell obscenities at every single action the other team takes. The bandwagon is so full of jackholes. Man, this weekend will be even worse, since all the Murph and Sully's really bring their A game when the Pinstripers are in town.
I'm proud to be a Sox fan and I still love going to Fenway Park to see them play. But I am considering bringing ear plugs the next time I go. Or I need to try and pull some strings and upgrade my tickets to another section. People try to live up to this ridiculous image of a bleacher creature. Just enjoy the game. Man, someone once warned me what winning would do to a fan base.
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